First Kiss
by Eggbert
Summary: Did you read the title? * Aaargh!* A R/S soppyslash in the form of a letter written while on the run.


FIRST KISS by Eggbert.  
  
  
  
Summary: - Did you read the title? Honestly! Fun for Moony and Padfoot in the Forbidden Forest.  
  
Rating - PG13. A kiss is just a kiss.  
  
Disclaimer:- Not mine and never will be. All I own is the slash plot.  
  
An embarrassed Sirius popped into my head. Everywhere he's portrayed as the great seducer. So I made him a little shy.  
  
Dedication:- This is for Brenda. For giving me time.  
  
My darling Remus,  
  
I can still remember the first time. Our final year at Hogwarts, yes and we had the whole of lives ahead of us. Cliché. Cliché. But true.  
  
When did I realise that I wanted you, that I didn't just need you as a friend but as so much more?  
  
Who knows? Anyway I didn't think you were that way inclined. You were almost androgynous then, impossibly slender with those beautiful eyes. Your smile had come to mean everything to me, a thing I needed to see every day and I cursed myself for being an idiot, for risking something so precious.  
  
I never had a problem with my sexuality, I was comfortable in my own skin, especially when I confessed it to the three of you in our sixth year and you all shrugged and replied along the lines of " So what? "  
  
  
And I wasn't the only one who desired you, Moony. Severus Snape lusted after you with an almost predatory intent and I knew, given the opportunity, he would have you. Whether you wanted it or not. Bastard.  
Even after all these years thinking of him makes me want to spit.  
  
I couldn't tell you how I felt. I mean, what if you hated me for it? So I stuck with my role as protector and I think you were grateful.  
  
Then James told me the most wonderful thing.  
  
" Moony told me something last night." He said, grinning all over his face, the git. " He likes you, Sirius. "  
  
I just stood there and gawked at him.  
  
" I mean " continued James " he likes you. "  
  
" You're kidding! " I croaked  
  
" I'm serious. Now, are you going to do something about it?"  
  
" What do you mean? " I asked.  
  
" Oh, come off it, Sirius. " James howled. " You've been trailing after him like a lovesick puppy for ages. Even Peter's noticed. Lily and I are just dying for you two to get together. "  
  
I felt my mouth hang open again. James gave me a knowing smile and a none-too-gentle push in the direction of the Gryffindor common room.  
  
I'm not the timid sort, honestly. But you were reading an enormous Defence Against the Dark Arts in the corner of the room, your long legs tucked under you, and I felt my nerve disappear as I walked towards you.  
  
If James had been kidding about this I would strangle the bastard with my bare hands and never mind the fact that he was my best friend. We loved playing jokes on each other. I prayed this wasn't one of them.  
  
You looked up as I approached, giving me a shy smile.  
  
" Hello, Sirius, " you said, closing the book after marking your place.  
  
" Wancomwokwimby? " I stuttered.  
  
" What? " You raised your delicate eyebrows at the pure gibberish I had just uttered. I felt myself redden. So much for being silver-tongued. Shit. I'd never been so embarrassed in my whole life. This was worse than the time I asked Brenda Jones to the second-year party. At least you didn't giggle.  
  
" I want to talk to you. Come for a walk with me. Please? " Finally I had control of my tongue.  
  
" Yes, okay then, " you replied, getting gracefully to your feet.  
  
It was pissing down with rain that day as we left the castle and walked across the grounds. I didn't trust my tongue not to betray me again so I listened to you instead. By now we had reached the outskirts of the Forbidden Forest and, in a small clearing just inside, we stopped.  
  
You looked at me with those beautiful amber-flecked eyes.  
  
" Is there something wrong, Sirius? You're awfully quiet. "  
  
Ask him, what was left of my rational brain prompted me. If you don't do it now, you never will.  
  
" James said..." I stuttered. " He told me today...he said you'd said you were attracted to me. " I blushed like a winter sunset as you smiled.  
  
" Is it true? " I demanded.  
  
" Yes, it's true, " you replied and I believe I groaned with relief that I hadn't made a complete idiot of myself.  
  
" I find you very attractive. " you continued. " I wasn't quite sure how to tell you but I knew James wouldn't waste any time. I just had to hope that you liked me that way as well. " I grinned, delighted.  
  
You were way, way too tempting with your rainflecked hair curling at the nape of your neck, your hands buried in the pockets of your robes, an impish smile curving the corners of your mouth and I just stood there and grinned, unable to believe my luck.  
  
You gave an impatient sigh and the next thing I knew your arms were round me and your soft warm lips were pressed to mine.  
  
I was momentarily startled, then relaxed into your embrace, enjoying the feel of your slight body held tight against me and the delicate pressure of your mouth on mine. I raised a hand to stroke your rain-dampened hair, holding you tighter again, revelling in your sweetness.  
  
Our first kiss. By some miracle we didn't catch pneumonia that day, the length of time we stood kissing in the Forest and what happened later... is another story entirely.  
  
Some memories burn brighter than others but the realisation that I loved you completely, irrevocably, dawned on me that day and that memory burns brightest of all.  
  
And I love you still.  
  
Sirius.  



End file.
